This was written for Circle of Titles in 2016, when I was assigned the title “Strategies to Live,” which felt super relevant given the then-recent Presidential election which was at odds with my safety as a trans person.
It took me five years to release this album, and I kept on feeling like it was too late to release this topical song, and yet, somehow it manages to remain topical.
You can hide yourself down a deep, dark hole Or hoist yourself on a really tall pole Anything that’ll help you get away
You can do heavy drugs to numb the pain, or Ask a surgeon to remove your brain So you can fit right in and start to play
Change your face and change your name Hide everything that brings you shame Or go on a preemptive sneak attack
Dig deep into the viper’s pit Embroil yourself in petty shit Just commit ‘coz there’s no turning back
Oh, I wish I didn’t worry oh so much Oh, I wish I could feel fine Oh, if only all my hopes weren’t out of touch I wish my safety wasn’t on the line
If you’re accused of doing a bad crime Want to hide for a very very very long time Consider all the possibilities
Make a run for President Convince the people you are heaven sent You might just win and then you are home free
Even if you’re caught lying Everyone gives you points for trying It’s not that the bear stakes well, it skates at all
Even if you destroy the world It doesn’t matter, you can fuck every girl And then you can go home and take your ball
In the long run everything will be fine It will just be a matter of time, in Twelve billion years this will all be gone
In the meantime just try to survive The world is better with you alive Outliving him is a reason to go on
I was going through a breakup, with someone who really wanted me to do more than I was able.
You shouldn’t fall For anyone at all Eventually you’re gonna hit the ground
Everything you do Please do it just for you Because you are so great to have around
And if you should fall From something ten feet tall I’ll try to catch you and make it okay
But everything I do I can’t do just for you I won’t always be there to save the day
And then if I should fall From fifty stories tall I hope that you’ll be there right next to me
And everything we do We ask each other to Even if we sometimes disagree
But you shouldn’t fall For anyone at all No matter what you think that you have found
And everything you do Please do it just for you Because I don’t want you to hit the ground
You started out thinking you were headin’ for a revolution You got some friends together but it really got out of hand
Now you’re spending your nights singing songs in an institution And that’s what it’s like when you’re livin’ in a traveling band
I heard what the robot said I’m going back to bed ‘Cause I know if I don’t get enough sleep I’ll just be seein’ red
I think I’ll stay inside No reason not to hide Maybe if they don’t hear a peep They’ll think I already died
How we gonna get ourselves out of this one Why can’t they just go and shoot the moon Someone should do something about this terror from outer space I hope that this bad nightmare is ending soon
I heard what the robot said I’m going back to bed Seeing that big pneumatic drill Fills me up with dread
I just can’t stay inside Even if they think I died Smoking crater where it was my favorite hill Maybe it’s time to hide
How we gonna get ourselves out of this one Why’d they have to go and shoot the moon Someone should do something about this threat to the human race I hope that this bad nightmare is ending soon
You’re lying awake in bed Something happens in your head You’re not sure if you’re alone Somewhere, somebody moans Voices that you hear take your breath away
You’re not sure what you see It keeps you in captivity An alien, a parasite Torturing you through the night You wake up and everything seems okay
The reticular activating system Controls if the nerve impulse reaches your hands Like an engine with a misfiring piston Things go out of whack You have a panic attack And the night terror seems so real you cannot stand
Serotonin overload Somewhere in your frontal lobe Dopamine suppression is to Always keep you guessing Hippocampus shouldn’t be on call
The brain is running like clockwork In a mechanical Turk Systems poorly factored and they’re Cheaply manufactured It’s a wonder anything works at all
And the reticular activating system Controls if the nerve impulse reaches your hands Like an engine with a misfiring piston Things go out of whack You have a panic attack And the night terror seems so real you cannot stand